Oh Rikki, I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling too. Someone once told me that if everyone sat in a circle and put their problem in the middle . . .then had to choose which one to pick out . . That everyone would choose their own problem. I don't know why this helps me but it does. I think i like to interpret it as . . . This problem i have is one of the things that my soul decided it needed to learn in this lifetime, and i just to have hang in and experience it. Not that i am any advert for succeeding at that! But i do thing there is truth in it. I have a very wealthy friend who doesn't have to worry about money or ever losing even one of his properties BUT I would not swop problems with him, because his problem relates to his children and their mental health and broken family connections. I really do wish for you better times. I have faith you can and will find your way to a different more contented life. Sending warm wishes, love Annie 🙂🙏💚💚💚