I think I was a loving mother, but I was like you - I let mine work out for themselves what they could do. I got harangued a few times in the park by other mothers for letting my toddlers climb high up on frames that had drops onto concrete! They hadn't invented the soft cushioning back then. They came to no harm and, I think, grew up with a sense that they could DO things. Kids aren't suicidal and it is good for them to learn what they are capable of. I'm with you on this. I love how you moved from toddlers to the elderly. My approach with the elderly is much the same although i will state the occasional: let me know if you want any help with that. Just in case they have failed to learn how to ask for help. Nice one.